Fenix Fyre
The Best of "Jump The Shark"

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Do you remember a time when you are watching one of your favorite television shows and something happens that is so ridiculous that it makes the whole show go sour?  Well, that is what JUMP THE SHARK is all about. (Click link for explanation as to the sites title).  Here are the best of what I feel are explanations for why certain shows have Jumped The Shark.

 

ALF

This show was horrible. I can't believe there are this many people willing to admit that they liked it. Go and watch the movie "Permanent Midnight". It's about Jerry Stahl, who was one of the writers on the show. He was a raging crackhead junkie, and yet he was still able to spew out this mindless sitcom crap. That should tell you something about the effort that was required to write for this show.

Why the hell did Alf have to wear a sweatshirt? Was he balding? Was the puppet getting ragged and they didn't have the budget for a new coat of fake fur? This kind of coincided with the period when they had to introduce the pregnancy plotline. It also coincided with the period when the show stopped being funny altogether.

I never could understand why ALF lasted as long as it did because it's JUST NOT FUNNY!!! ALF was basically a walking disaster area cracking lame jokes. I'm surprised the family didn't kick his furry ass out a long time ago. Even his little Johnny Carson tribute (anyone remember that one?) was pathetic. Now 10-10-220 has the gall to bring him back. WHY??? Was there some outcry to bring ALF back that I didn't know about? "Ha, ha! I kill me!" No, Alf, you killing us! And it's pure torture!! Time for the shark to munch on the cat-eater.

ALL IN THE FAMILY

I always thought this show was vastly overrated, but that whole idea of this guy trying to rape Edith! Please! Her voice would be enough to hold her off. Plus, why didn't he just rape her and have done with it. Like the 'talking killer' except he was a 'talking rapist'.

AMERICA'S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEOS

 

GOOD LORD--DOESN'T ANYONE REMEMBER HAVING TO ENDURE OTHER PEOPLES HOME MOVIES OR TRAVELOGUES AS A KID-IT WAS PAINFUL THEN AND I AM LESS TOLERANT NOW!! WHAT KIND OF IDIOT PUTS THIS SHIT ON THE AIR? I'VE ENDURED DENTAL WORK THAT WAS FUNNIER THAN THIS MORONIC HORSECRAP-NO CRUELTY TO ANIMALS INTENDED. WHO EVER DECIDED THAT CROTCH SHOTS, BABIES WITH SPAGHETTI IN THEIR HAIR, AND WHINING BRATS BLOWING SNOT BUBBLES WAS FUNNY? I DON'T WANT TO SEE GERIATRIC UNDERWEAR ANTICS, NOSEPICKERS AND KIDS' RECITAL BLOOPERS ON TV-CAKE IN THE FACE AT THE WEDDING RECEPTION IS A GREAT WAY TO START A MARRIAGE---I AM NOT AMUSED. AND TELL THESE CAM-HAPPY IDIOTS WHO SUBMIT TO THIS PROGRAM TO CLEAN UP THEIR FREAKIN' HOUSES BEFORE THEY MAKE THEIR STUPID VIDEOS. IT'S HARD TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN "COPS" AND THIS SHOW--ATLEAST THE DOPERS GETTIN BUSTED ON "COPS" CAN USE THEIR DRUG ABUSE AS AN EXCUSE TO LIVE IN A PIG STY. NO WONDER PEOPLE IN FOREIGN COUNTRIES HATE AMERICANS.

ANNA NICOLE SHOW

 

Ah geez, what in the hell kinda television are we being forced to watch now? The Anna Nicole Show...damn it all, but this HAS to be the absolute worst show in the history of television. Here we have this tractor-seat sized misfit stumbling her way through life; jumping into other peoples' bathtubs and beds, mumbling some crap about masturbating, crawling under tables like a hockey helmet wearing "special" child, telling her kid to practice lapdancing...what an asshole! And through it all, the American public is being coerced into believing this is what WE believe to be entertaining, that we actually LIKE the show and it's star, and that we are looking forward to EVEN MORE of her! NO, I'm sorry to the three or four people who find TANS entertaining, but it is nothing more than rotting garbage. In fact, the theme song was the first hard evidence this show was going to blow to high heavens. Then it took about one minute 'till I found this heffer and everything about her to be completely annoying. Only with the help of Maalox was I able to stomach my way through the rest of the show. Please, oh please, will someone in position of control at E! pull the plug on this abortion of a program? For cryin' out loud, make it stop, please make it stop!!...

BEVERLY HILLS 90210

DON'T BE FOOLED, SILLY HUMANS... TORI SPELLING IS REALLY ADMIRAL ACKBAR IN A WIG!